Something is stirring...
It’s baffling how easy it is for me to make a new place my home, to adapt and shift and mold to a completely new way of living, and yet be so controlled by the little nuances of my daily life.
Italy makes me believe I can befriend time.
I’m sitting in a cafe with a man who offers a kind smile, speaks slowly, and waves from inside the window. People pass in and out, some standing, some preferring to sit and read the paper. The glances are both obvious and numerous, but I shake them off as if I am some rare and precious species on the cusp of extinction.
Italians have mastered the art of balancing work and play.
Every meal, we spread the tablecloth, set the table, and the kitchen fills with the sound of forks scraping against ceramic, compliments to the chef (and maybe a few critiques). Italians have this distinct way of often sounding both serious and poetic when they talk, like everything they choose to say holds meaning. Because it usually does. They’re okay with silence when it’s called for. They’re okay to laugh and be silly when it makes sense to be so. They know when to release the tension in their shoulders and when it’s time for hard work.
Every time I go out, I feel a push pull effect. I take one step closer, one step closer to feeling like I am breaking down a wall that separates the mystery of this place and my own self. But at the same time, I feel the weight of two stones being placed back at the top. Language. It’s like Italy is encased in a snow globe and I shake and shake and shake the beauty out of it but there is still the glass. I am looking through a window to a life I will never fully know.
Italy has taught me how to never live past the day. Diana, my radiant roommate, explains that the only good work is work done for the sake of others. We had a beautiful conversation about faith the other day. When you live a life of service, God seems to take care of the rest.
I am trying to find out what this path looks like in my own life. I know this is not my forever, and in this moment I can feel something stirring, something shifting. Slowly, day by day I pray that the next step becomes clear to me. Until then, I will stay close to the people God has put in my vicinity. For it’s the people more than anything that has left a lasting impact on my time here thus far.